Ask The Question: 21 Conversation Starters

My wife and I have spent more of our married life living overseas than we have in the United States, and for a good portion of that time, we were without our own car. It forced us to rely on public transportation, which turned out to be a great witnessing opportunity for us. Through that experience, we learned that the Lord's pairing of us made for evangelistic opportunities. Shy by nature, starting a conversation was difficult for her, but once it was started, she could carry it and direct it much better than I could. Yet, it was much easier for me to initiate the discussion. Therefore, in a cab or on a bus, the Lord used me to launch a conversation, and He used her to direct the conversation, allowing us to share the gospel together.

As the years have passed, I've found that our struggles are not uncommon. It does not seem to matter the context, culture, or condition, many Christians struggle first to initiate a conversation, but also how to direct a conversation towards a gospel-sharing opportunity. Though the ultimate discussion depends upon an individual's personal attempt and the supreme work of the Holy Spirit, I want to share with you some questions you can use to start and/or direct a conversation toward the life-saving, life-transforming work of the gospel. Allow me to divide these questions into three categories, beginning with some questions meant to provoke a general conversation.

• If you could converse with anyone in history, living or dead, who would it be and why?
• Where would you be if you could travel anywhere in the world? OR What is the most interesting place you have ever visited?
• What’s the best book you have read recently? OR what movie have you enjoyed recently?
• What’s your favorite thing about (insert current event, location, trend, etc.)?
• If you could change one thing about the world, what would it be?
• What is the most valuable lesson you learned in life so far?
• What is your biggest fear, and how do you deal with it?

None of these questions is evangelistic in nature by themselves. However, they are meant, first, to provoke conversation. In doing so, the hope is that some of the answers given might lead you toward a direction to arrive at the gospel at some point as well.

There are times when it is more necessary to jump right in towards the gospel. Here are some questions specifically curated for creating an opportunity for that conversation in those cases.

• Do you attend (or have you ever attended) church? (You can follow this question up with a discussion about where they go, why, why they may have stopped, or why they have never gone).
• What do you think is the purpose of life?
• What do you think happens after death?
• Most people in the United States say they believe in God. What does it mean to believe?
• What do you believe about God? OR what do you believe about Jesus?
• What do you believe about the Bible?
• What is your perception of Christians? (This question is loaded and can derail the conversation, so be discerning about when and with whom you use it).

These are straightforward questions that require a thoughtful response from the person you are speaking to. However, if you are careful not to let the conversation drift toward tertiary issues, they should create an immediate opportunity to launch into the gospel.Sometimes, though, the hardest conversations are with those you know more deeply. They may know you go to church and show a lack of interest, yet you have a heart burdened for them. Those conversations get harder because you want to be thoughtful and loving, honor the Lord, and preserve the relationship for further opportunities in the future. So, how do you approach those conversations? Consider some of the following questions.

• Will you go to church with me? (Simply invite them once to church).
• Can we talk about your experience at my church? (If they say yes, offer to have a follow-up conversation over a cup of coffee about what your church believes and why).
• Can I share with you what I have learned as a (insert some stage of life)? Share with them things you have learned as a husband or wife, father or mother, student, or whatever stage of life that person is in that you have also experienced.
• Offer the person a tract or (short) book oriented towards the gospel and then ask, “If you will read this, I will buy you breakfast so we can chat about it. Are you willing to do that?”
• What are some of your regrets in life? How have you dealt with those regrets?
• What causes you stress in life?
• What has your experience shown you about God? (Like question 7 in the last section, this can be a loaded question, and you need to be prepared for their response and ready to guide the discussion so you don't get waylaid by tertiary talks).

These questions are meant to be more profound and structured so that you can have multiple conversations with someone. In some ways, maybe these questions seem basic. Yet, sometimes, we need just a bit of help or suggestion to get things moving. Sharing the gospel is intimidating, and being prepared with prompts can help you share if you are willing to be used by God. That's where it starts, though . . . with your willingness to stake the first step and simply start the conversation.